ardent enslavement by Nur A. Hamzah

"she longs for her own complete destruction and for ecstatic union and identification with him. She submits to him as if to a god and seeks to be another incarnation of her loved one, his reflection, his double" (de Beauvoir cited in Friedman, 127: 2003). Feminist theories have for all time contended that romantic love hold destructive fusion for women. Simone de Beauvoir’s 'The Second Sex' in 1949, conceived "a woman in love to long for abolition of the boundaries that separate her from her male lover" (Friedman, 127: 2003). De Beauvoir believed, because no man is god, women in love were making a bad judgment by being in love. "she chooses her enslavement so ardently, that it will seem to her the expression of her liberty" (de Beauvoir cited in Friedman, 128: 2003).Perhaps, no subject to which the famous feminist slogan; "the personal is political", is more pertinent than that of romantic love" (Langford cited in Cossolett, Easton and Summerfield, 23: 1996)....

so. uh-hm. copied-n'-pasted the extract above fm my sociology of women studies [ie-feminism] essay last semester. fuh:: i dont even remember writing it. just recall the trepidation involved in the process of writing it. submitted it in a week late and had to juggle b/n studying for one more exam and completing this. amaze me how i come up with wonderful shit like this one. so anyhows, i dug a hole in my pocket. hahah. bought $200 worth of text-books. man-oh-man. i have a ::hole-in-my-pocket-now::. geddit?! =) i figured its either "the-shoes" or "textbooks-n'-higher-chances-of-passing-exams". i chose e' latter obviously. so. i chose bks OVER shoes!!! in ling's world, tt's a crime punishable by a death sentence. nono. punishable by exile FROM THIS EARTH! its official; i-m-a-lame-ass-nerd-of-a-loser. did u know i used to slp at 8pm and wake up 6am? i would call ling then and she'd "cut me off". some things never change. she's still a meanie-mo. hrmph* HA-HA-HA =)

reached home 4-ish and it was scorching hot AND frost-windy @ e' same time. arh the contradictions of melbourne weather just neverevereverever fails to amuse/ annoy/ frustrate me. tried my mini. manssss ... i HAVE DEF gained weight since last summer. it used to be able to spin-round-round my waist! and now its -just-fitting-. sighs*. depressing discovery. we gonq go st kilda tmr IF its hot. summer is here! well.. spring has to come 1st la.

been sitting in front of my lappie since i got bk. i hv no life:: designing pics. experimenting with photoshop. finding songs. blog-hopping. yah-yah. havent been eating right the past few days. i dont know whether to put it on "laziness" or "tireness". im sleepy and its barely 10. uhm. maybe coz i slept at 4am and woke up at 7 maybe? t'was worth it tho. despite my 's t o n i ng' mode now, a part of me is still in elation for being able to actually produce tangible ans to those test qns. i-m ---high-high-high-up there in cloud 9 and beyoOooond--- almost like being in love. hrm..... didnt i say i am a i-m-a-lame-ass-nerd-of-a-loser? now im equalising 'the-wonders-of-being-in-love' with 'being-able-to-answer-test-qns'. i dont even know if they were right! ok. i remember what i wanna do. call my mama. abg just asked if i have an eraser. im tired. ok. nites =)