time: 12:19am
music: dear friend - stacie orrico
mood: everything's funny-haha now.
*the well-wishers. dee's departure.
[x] lis. kin.
[x] dee. kin.
[x] diyar. kin.
[x] tess. kin.
[x] the ones who sent dee off.
yes. i miss the incessant way she puts me down (in that positive way of course). i miss how she'd holler my name across fushan garden with a home made cupa in hand, just to get me up at blardy 7am, wait for me while i get dressed, so i can hang out with her. in school, i miss how we randomly sing along to the soundtrack of phantomoftheopera in class. how she'd vandalise my palm in chemistry, how we drove hazlan crazy devoting out attention to our romance novels instead. i miss how she annoyingly corrects my english midsentence, how she talks sense into me. haiyah. i miss u la woman. getcha ass back here asap aye? its a funny feeling; for u to be away instead of vice versa. u know? ok. so maybe, i need your home made coffee too! hehe! love you to the moon and back dee. i swear!
>>>>
it's all about you.
well well well.. it's one of those nights again. you found an old letter you wrote to yourself when you were 15. you said you were going to be a graduate by 23. so that makes you 3 years ahead of your plans. you're thankful for everything in life. it all make sense and yet not. but you're suddenly alright with not knowing. you know, this is not a permaneant situation. you know tomorrow morning, tomorrow evening, tomorrow night, oh hell, maybe even at 3am later, when you are jolted awake just before you smash into bits onto the pavements, you might panic about tomorrow. life leaves you flabberghasted. you remind yourself its the same for everyone. noone has the cheat-codes to life. sometimes, you feel you live in oblivion. you hate that you're gullible. you hate that you're ignorant. yes. life for you begins tomorrow. you're excited. you're afraid it might mean more changes and you dont know if you can handle anymore changes. you tell yourself to be brave. but you hate that you're shy. you feel you will enjoy work. you dont know yourself sometimes. you plan to sleep soon. you think "excellent" is a funny word. excellent. you feel so distracted tonight. you love to laugh. a lot. you space out alot on random thoughts. you wish you remember what you think about. you enjoy people-watching. you wonder alot about people. - trivial microscopic ticks of people, of strangers. issues. you have issues. you hate issues. you are over-using the word "issues". issues. you bite your nails when you're nervous. you hate that you're transparent. as always, you can't put a finger on your thoughts. caffeine thoughts. you're having caffeine thoughts.
gdnight world!
i miss my papa
but i had a wholesome weekend.
did you?
