subject: blindspot
time: 11:03am
music: won't let you fall - fergie
mood: edgy

daffodils

venus. come with the dawn, i hope to not recall being here, and in my place lingers the grave smell of a grave place. perform a trick of the heart, phantasm of the mind? journey = not over, we are stuck lifeless in time. it is not elusive. it isnt even there. maybe just a beautiful dream that we all share; mildly under exposed and a little bit over developed, you are slowly blurring out of focus to vacillate into dream-like pictures color toned aimed at hiding my flaws.

spin. i spin on a never ending ferris wheel, high up or down low. spread my arms and let me grasp only what i want to see. blindspotted to denying all rules of all reality and all other laws. all always cropping out failures, blemish free.

please. pretty please. let me hold a star in my palm, embrace beds of sand. those golden grains that spell of moments shared. tear filled breaths in time we wish to remember and forget - a reminder of the things i thought would last forever. remember a boy who in my dreams, sang a lullaby oh so sweet, i slept forever... how sad, how happy and sad. how lucky and unlucky i have been.

fallen. not a gentle slip into the drain, or a bump on the head, but a nerve-twitching, vertebrate-crumbling, breath-laden effect, and the last memory of standing was myself scrutinizing someone elses' life, that seem all too familiar, and i know, i know. this has always been. one second too late, two seconds too quick, too little to hold on to, too much to give, but i sigh and you smile and we cry for it to stop, knowing it won't and we pray we'd die leaving loners sweet goodbyes.

how lonely, how sad, the world turns, love burns and me.. i am just only a small dream in a cotton-candy universe and promises.... promises are merely pretty shapes of forever kissed with death.